Who's next...

Mom got all our attention all along because she's sick.  Well, she is also the reason of this blog.  She is now gone and God told me to focus more on who's still around.  The first one after Dad was Gloria.  She's surely a blessing to my life.  I think I can only get worse without her.  Her kindness, gentleness, and her cheerful, loving, silly, joyful, sweet and fun character is just unbeatable.  She is someone you want to be with cuz' it's just so comfortable being around her.  I may look confident on the outside but I guess I can only show my true self to this woman, not telling you more though, haha.

Comparing to her, I'm so bad in all ways, haha.  This is also why I know what a better half means.  I think it's very obvious to everyone as well, cuz' everyone (including you) knows where all the bad qualities of Jake and Jonah are from, haha.  Yea, I know I am not perfect and I still have a lot to learn.  I did make boo-boos and had disappointed her; I will keep working hard to become a better husband and better father and a better spiritual leader in the house.  I just love this woman, period.  However, I will stop here cuz' she's a super low key type of person who doesn't want to be under the spot light.  So I'll save the rest between ourselves inside our bedroom, hohoho.  Hopefully, the boys can leave us alone, haha.  

So, who's next?

I don't think I have said it before...but why not? I love my sister! (Ok, fine...let's do it again.)  Mui, I love you!!! As brought up typically in a Chinese family, we don't normally say these three words.  Actually, its absolutely abnormal to say it.  Try doing it at home to your brothers, sisters and parents later tonight.  They will probably think something is wrong with you or if you need them for a big favor, haha.  Maybe that's why I didn't post it until after she has left, haha...yea, she left last night back to HK after such long "vacation".   

Fian is always the first who reads my blog, maybe she follows me close enough all the time, or she has set a notification on all my updates no matter if it's on Google, Blogger, Facebook, etc.  She is always the first one who would "like" my pictures, my links, my posts.  Well, we are on the same boat sharing the same Mom I guess, hahaha.  She is probably my biggest fan who would share it right away too.  (The next one is probably you, haha.  Thanks for reading still, hehe.)

Last time, after she finished reading my previous post about Mom and Dad, she told Dad right a way, "Dad, you are the main character this time!!!", haha.  It made it sound like I'm director or something, haha.  I was thinking in my head, maybe Fian will be next, haha.  She also said she can't do what I'm doing on this blog (writing so much, haha).  I think it's the first time I hear praise from her.  Actually, it may not be a praise but I don't care, I'll take it as a compliment, haha.

That's right, it's Fian's turn this time.  Fian is my only sibling.  Even though I look much younger, haha, she's really my baby sister.  I know I still don't act like one but I'm really her big brother, haha.  Other than the time before she's born, she's been with me my whole life.  Sharing is the first word that came into my head cuz' Fian is mine and no matter if it's good or bad, happy or sad, we'll be sharing everything.  I thank God for giving me Jake and Jonah.  They will also be sharing their lives together, I know.  Fian's just part of my life all along, from sharing the same piece of candy to sharing tissue papers for Mom's departure.   

Not sure if other siblings are like this, Fian and I are very very close for a few reasons...

• First of all, boys are less mature when girls are the opposite.  So our age gap made us “communicate-able”.  Mom and Dad’s timing was perfect (thank God too of course, hehehe).
• We share a lot of things in common including family (duh) and friends; actually all our friends are common.  Her friends are my friends and mine are hers, from school to church and from roommates to co-workers.  Thanks to Mom too, she insisted me to go out with Fian when we were young (I'll tell you more later).
• We attended the same school (Methodist School) when young sharing a lot of teachers.  That’s right; we even share teachers.  When all my teachers, who had taught me, looked at Fian’s name a few years after, they knew she’s related to me (we do have pretty close Chinese names).  They all expected to see another naughty one according to their experience with ME, hahaha.  But they were all “disappointed” after just two days, hahaha.  Fian was a very good girl (see the word "was", hahaha).  Somehow, our teachers have very good memories about us.  Mom could be the reason as she taught in teachers’ collage back then (they know they couldn't mess up with their inspector’s kids, hahaha).  Well, it could be me who was just a bit too “active”.    
• We also attending the same church, fellowship/cell groups both in SKWBC and MCBC with Mom and Dad since we were babies.  Our second home always…thank Mom and Dad again.  Yup, we share the same faith.
• We do have a lot common interests too, like we both love dancing (or we both can dance, haha), snowboarding, watching NBA, having same grow up idols (Grasshopper, Shirley, Alex, etc.), fighting for the moon cake salty egg yolks, ice cream and a lot more from our sleeping habits to our points of view.  

Thank God for giving us two teachers as parents.  To us, getting off school means seeing my parents as we share all holidays together.  Yup, we even have summer holidays TOGETHER!!!  And thanks to Mom’s commitment on travelling.  To us, having anything more than a long weekend means travelling with our free tour guide/leader/planner/navigator/super line jumper between different cashiers when lining up/yummy food chaser/hard to follow bargaining queen in a shopping mall (Mom) and our free bus boy/massaging machine/driver/bill payer/funniest joker/silliest friend/tendering lover (Dad), hehehe.  That's the last reason why we can be so close to each other - we spent a lot of time together!!!

When she was a baby, she's always the better one.  She's well behaved, neat and tidy, good and quiet.  Later, she became a confident, positive, calm and super care free young lady.  Now she's less care free and actually, sometimes she's kinda "long air", hahaha.  I can totally see Mom's shadow lately, haha.  She can concentrate and be focused no matter if the world is collapsing, or if I'm dancing silly in front of her face (yea, cuz' I was bored from the books, trying to ask her to play with me - never worked).  She can just simply ignored everything, haha.  Maybe that's why all her finals ranking at class are always single digits.  Yup, she did rank first in class (考第一).  

Her outgoing characteristics didn't start until she started St. Paul Co-Ed's (her high school back in HK).  Maybe she escaped from Mom's "palm" as teachers' teacher after grades school.  Thanks also to her friends from SP too, I guess (you know who you are, haha).  However, Mom is very strict on her cuz' she's a girl after all.  Mom never let her go out by herself and that means she would need to bring at least one of us: Mom, Dad or her only brother - me.  Being the coolest brother of hers, she always pick me!  I refused each time but Mom insisted not to let Fian go without me.  

As mentioned above, this is one of the many stories I want to share.  The first time happened when she was in grade 3/4 when her classmate Karen were about to leave (yes, it's you Karen).  Even though I didn't want to go, I didn't want my sister to be disappointed either.  It was a little tea party at Karen's house somewhere in Kowloon.  When I got there I only saw 4/5 other girls and all they did was chatting, playing Barbies, stuffed animals, cooking, tea partying, more chatting, some crafts, and the most boyish thing was playing in the outdoor playground by the parking!  And the only thing I wanted to do there was to ride this bike of Karen's.  It was so small and probably hasn't been used for some time.  The tires was so flat that when I stopped, my whole body flew forward leaving myself on the ground with the bike behind me!  Yea, I was trying to make a cool stop in front of the girls but it wasn't cool at all, it was actually very embarrassing (good thing my face skin was thick to begin with).  I was so mad that I promise myself not to go with Fian anymore forever.  However, you know what happened in reality or we wouldn't have so many common friends.  

That's right, my heart is always soft every time when Fian asked, "I want to go play basketball with my friends...", "pretty please...".  Even though I would say, "Go your head, no way!", I would get myself ready and went with her on the day of.  So all these friends' house, basketball games on Saturday morning, bubble teas chit chatting, and all these parties, etc. you can see both of us together always.  

There are just many many things I can share but let me tell you this which no one really knows.  Fian never cried no matter how she got "punished" by Mom and Dad but she would be balling if I'm mean to or yelling at her.  One thing I still want to thank her, even after Mom has left.  She never tell on me, no matter what I have done to her, no matter how harsh I was to her, no matter how hard I hit her.  She never, not even once, told Mom or Dad about anything bad I did.  I felt bad one time (and it's still in my memory cuz' I still feel bad) when she was crying and walking back in her room at Mei Foo after I hit her really hard.  We were probably still very young, maybe Grade 2 and 5.  I don't remember why I did that and I don't remember how hard I hit her but I do remember her back, in her loose PJ, crying so hard but didn't do much but just to walk back to her room.  She never said a word to Mom and Dad.  Mom and Dad weren't around that night but I remember.  They later found out through the nanny, not Fian.  I knew she loves me and she looked up to me big time ever since.  And that's the first time I felt bad hitting her and that's probably the last time hit her ever again.  Sorry Mui...

She came back with Mom and Dad back in September when Mom was feeling great and was fit to travel.  She followed the original plan leaving on the planned date while leaving Mom and Dad behind (when Mom's leukemia came back).  Everything else was recorded in my blog there after.  Even though she wasn't really in the picture physically but she's always part of us.  Thanks to the technology again, all the phone calls, emails, Whatsapp, FaceTime, Facebook, Tango, Skype, etc.  She is not a physician doctor but she has her PhD. done on pathology/cancer research.  Basically, she's our family adviser since day 1 regarding Mom's condition as she knows all these medical and chemical terms.  She also got chances to do actual testing for Mom's blood in her labs.  Thanks to her boss and all the connections, Mom got her checkup appointments, bone marrow biopsy, hospital admission, chemo treatments medication in no time at the early stage.

Her original plan was to come back after the Chinese New Year, sometime next week.  But with Mom's condition, she arrived on December 20th when Mom wanted to make the big decision together as a family.  When thinking back, she spent her first two weeks in the hospital with Mom and Dad.  Then, after God took Mom, she helped prepared for the funeral stuff the week after.  She finished packing/cleaning up Mom's stuff and completed a lot of paper works for the government, banks, insurance, etc. with Dad in the next two weeks.  Thank God that she finally got a week to relax a bit with us at the end.  It's always fun to have her around.  She's always part of my family and even though I want her to have her own soon, hahaha, I don't know if I'm ready yet.  And when she left last night, it's been already more than a month!!!  

I know I'm not just gonna miss Mom, but Fian too; and not just Fian, but our time spent together as a family with Dad, Gloria, the boys, Grandma and the Ng's.  That means there won't be as many bubble teas, half French half coffees, Nene's surprises (Fian's surprises for the boys), as many eat outs, oyster shucking, Candy Crushing and most importantly, Dad will really start living on his own!!!  Our lives are really back to "normal" without Mom.  Dad asked Fian to say bye to Mom before leaving their house last night.  Fian said, "No, what are you talking about?  I'm bringing Mom back to HK."  She's right though, Mom will always be with us, no matter where we are.  

I really hope that she is able to pick herself up in HK as she's going through everything once again from scratch over there when Dad and I are not around.  I'm sure she will have her tough times but I also know I have you to rely on when I'm not around her.  Thanks in advance.  We, not being able to be around her, will for sure pray for her and keep checking up on her, hehehe.  God has His plan always.  Trust and obey.

Yesterday when Fian left, it was February 4th, exactly one month after Mom's departure.  Time really flies is all I can say.  Everything does fall in His plan.  "Ar Mui, Siu Sum D"...That's right, Fian is my real sister after all.  How can I not love her? 

^"

Treat younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity." (1 Timothy 5:1-2)